Shithouse rat

I'm a bipolar writer in the Naked City. I'm not playing with a full deck. I don't have all my dots on the dice. My cheese is sliding off my cracker. I don't have both oars in the water. I'm a bubble off plum. In other words, I'm crazier than a shithouse rat. These are my stories. Comments--short or long, nasty or nice--always welcome!

Friday, May 20, 2005

Invasion of the psychotics

Thanks to the brand new blogs created by my two fave fellow bipolars, we now have a wacky three-ring psycho circus of assorted nuts!

And heeere they are...

Henry, the wondrous techno-wiz who posts comments here early and often, and who has just made it (finally!!!) possible for me to hyperlink (you rule! you are a cyber-god!), has just started a little thing he likes to call Babblings. Henry is a native New Yorker, but moved to sunny California before it was too late. He's just been diagnosed with bipolar II--welcome to the club, Henry! Always room for one more. Only one major mental illness so far, but my man Henry really works it. What burns Henry's ass most? Brain-dead judges and Michael Moore.

Ice, my fellow sufferer in the hellacious BP support group for psychotic psychopaths (see Support Group? Feh!), whose wise words have also graced this site, not only has bipolar but also Borderline Personality Disorder and some sex 'n' gender issues. He sees himself more as a woman, is attracted to men, but has virtually no sex drive whatsoever! Do check him out...

As for yours truly, my doc has me down for a number of different wacko gigs. I'm such a changeling: when I "get those blues way deep down in my shoes," I just love to take those little rest cures, get my noggin zapped with a zillion volts, and fry those brain cells as crispy as well-done bacon. That's when I have major depression with psychotic features. Then there's times like these, when my fingers are a-flyin' and I can't unglue them from the keyboard. That's bipolar II coming at you. And finally, just to keep things interesting, there's a little obsessive compulsive disorder thrown into the mix. This means that I waste a lot of precious time before leaving the house in a vain and pointless search for nonexistent smouldering cigarette butts. I also like to check the stove a dozen times in case I have somehow inadvertently turned the burners back on in some sort of spastic fugue state. And then there's the sinks, the sinks....check 'em for drips, and check 'em good, because BG would be pretty darn pissed if he came home to see the apt. floating away, post-tsunami style . I'm also a New Yorker, which means I'm already pre-approved for insanity.

And just for an extra added attraction, we have a computer-phobic psycho by proxy: none other than my boyfriend BG. BG is many things to many shrinks.Thanks to his many, many hospitalizations, his diagnoses have ranged from simple schizophrenia to undifferentiated schizophrenia to paranoid schizophrenia, schizoaffective disorder, and Ice's fave rave, borderline personality disorder. Though the lot of us are definitely not playing with a full deck, BG undoubtedly holds all the wild cards. Does a full house beat a straight flush?

We three newbie psycho-bloggers already have an incestuous, uber-pomo scene going on, and we're now insanely busy posting comments to each other's comments on previous comments.

So I invite one and all--crazies and "normies" alike--to check us all out before we get checked in.

Invasion of the psychotics: now playing at a blogspot near you. Be afraid. Be very afraid.

And remember: in cyberspace, no one can hear you scream...

8 Comments:

At 3:01 AM, Blogger Preston said...

ROFL!!!

OMG, I think I will start wearing Depends while reading your blog, Elvira.

I'm so glad I "met" you.

 
At 3:38 AM, Blogger Preston said...

Again, LMAO!!! The tears are rolling down my painful cheeks, I've been laughing so hard.

I couldn't have said it better myself.

Blog on to save the planet!!

 
At 5:12 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dear Blackie,

There's nothing wrong with being a little bi-polar. At least you got it honest. Too bad I can't say the same for your friendly crackhead neighbors. Their disorders go way beyond the realm of normal obsessive compulsive behavior. The only real help for them doesn't come in pill form. Only prison bars will help their affliction.
BLLB

 
At 9:14 AM, Blogger elvira black said...

Thanks, Henry. Better stock up on both the t.p. and the adult undergarments...I am flattered that you almost soiled yourself over my rantings.

BLLB: How true. I think that bad people are users and decent people are giving of themselves, and even if they have an affliction such as a mental illness or substance abuse problem, that is not an excuse for being immoral or using others. So there!

 
At 3:32 AM, Blogger Rob said...

This is really an insane world where all conditions are set for madness. Why else would a "normal" person strap to a bomb to detonate among many? Oppression creates insanity, war is insane, those little piggies dictating how everyone should live are insane, so what's a little madness?

 
At 7:46 AM, Blogger elvira black said...

Rob:

Yes, how true. The inmates are indeed running the big asylum. I'm just running my humble little one here.

 
At 6:37 PM, Blogger elvira black said...

Judith:

You're not on the outside when you're inside chez shithouse rat! This is a little koo koo's cocoon, where this particular inmate is running the asylum. Welcome, and visit early and often...

 
At 11:55 PM, Blogger Preston said...

Had to stop by for another giggle....

8-P

 

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