Shithouse rat

I'm a bipolar writer in the Naked City. I'm not playing with a full deck. I don't have all my dots on the dice. My cheese is sliding off my cracker. I don't have both oars in the water. I'm a bubble off plum. In other words, I'm crazier than a shithouse rat. These are my stories. Comments--short or long, nasty or nice--always welcome!

Tuesday, October 03, 2006

Who would have thought...

I'd do the same thing I always believed was so uncool to do as a blogger--at least by my own "lofty" standards--namely, not answer comments and just let the blog slide away...

Firstly, I am grateful to Walker and all others who took the time to comment during my absence, and I'm sorry I haven't responded. I do appreciate the feedback immensely.

Thing is, though I'm a member of the Bipolar Planet webring, looking back I don't think the majority of my posts dealt overmuch with my disorder. When I get depressed, rather than talk about it I tend to withdraw altogether. This time, my decline was not with a bang, or even a whimper. I didn't become psychotic, or have to be hospitalized. But it seems I hit a point where I just devolved into zombification. I lost my enthusiasm and drive for writing and most everything else.

In any event, I feel a bit more hopeful now because my Manhattan coop, which I co-own with my ex-boyfriend G, is finally on the market, after over a year of prepping it. But of course now the housing market has taken a downturn, so who knows how long it may take to sell. Talk about your lousy timing. And to top it off, G and I are at odds on the asking price--he's insisted on pricing it higher than I think is wise, and after reading endless real estate blogs and articles this seems like the cardinal no-no in a declining market.

Oy vey, just writing about it is putting me into a funk. More later, hopefully...

28 Comments:

At 7:13 AM, Blogger Reverend Z said...

Good to see you back, I hope you're getting de-zombified and that you'll be online more.

 
At 1:34 PM, Anonymous Flowers said...

Is Bipolar Planet that Maniac Depression?

 
At 10:10 PM, Blogger elvira black said...

Thanks, Reverend Z--aside from being a nonentity here, I haven't been visiting my blogpals, but maybe I can tear myself away from the real estate sites since they're so depressing anyway and visit you guys to see what you've been up to. Hope all is well!

 
At 10:12 PM, Blogger elvira black said...

Flowers:

You gave me a good chuckle there...bipolar is the current term for what used to be called manic depression. I'm not afraid to call myself crazy or even psychotic on occasion, but I wouldn't go so far as maniac.

 
At 10:29 PM, Blogger Walker said...

WELCOME BACK !!!!!!!!

Good to see you back.
I was feeling alone while you were absent.
I come here to just hear what you say and it doesn't matter what it is.
What I do know it will be worth reading and listening to your thoughts.
Good to hear about the co-op to bad about the small problem but it is a small problem it will gi eventually.
In some way I feel G is stalling and clinging onto it for what ever reason.

Glad to have you back :)

 
At 12:10 AM, Blogger elvira black said...

Walker, thank you for being such a good friend. Your comment made me feel so much better.

G and I broke up 8 years ago, and we began the process of getting the place ready to sell over a year ago. Not that he wanted to, but he got himself into serious debt and his sis had to bail him out so he had no choice.

Yes, he has been dragging his feet but I don't know if it's just laziness and lethargy at this point. He insists he wants to get out and sell now...so I guess I'll see.

Thanks so much again Walker!

 
At 4:00 PM, Anonymous Mark said...

I hope you can rid yourself of the temporary lull, Elvira... because you're really a fun writer to read when you get rolling.

I recommend you find something in your life that really makes you laugh, and store that energy like a squirrel with acorns. Cheers.

 
At 12:05 AM, Blogger elvira black said...

Mark, thanks so much for the kind words--from a fellow BC'er, no less! I really enjoy your writing too, btw. Hmmm...something to make me laugh--maybe the fact that I actually can't wait to move from Manhattan to the Bronx! How's that for a start?

 
At 4:34 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm convinced your slide back into the doldrums is down to not meeting with me when I visited your cute little town back in July. It's always wise to rub shoulders with unfortunate, less talented people than yourself. I'm sure I would have made you feel like a million dollars. And by the way, do I detect some negative vibes against maniacs? I'm hurt... :-)

 
At 10:38 PM, Blogger e.e. said...

I know exactly how you feel... well, at least in terms of the depression part and withdrawing completely...

I am happy I kept checking back in. Welcome back, m'lady.
Chin up!
:-)

 
At 5:09 PM, Blogger elvira black said...

Don:

Now cut that shit out! You know you are da bomb with me. I'm glad that you're back to your old url because your elusiveness made you a bit hard to track for awhile. As it is, I see that some of your older posts are missing in action--frustrating, because I think you're a terrific blogger with a wicked wit. And I do regret not meeting up with you, but my own insecurities about face to face encounters during my "blah" phase messed the whole thing up. But I was really glad to hear that you enjoyed NYC, though I think the bowels of hell would have been cooler this past summer. Thanks as always for stopping by--you always make me feel better!

 
At 5:11 PM, Blogger elvira black said...

ee:

I'm so glad to hear from you but...where are you? Ah, my blogger pals of old are very elusive nowadays...

 
At 9:27 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Elvira,

You're too kind.

I'm afraid I didn't bother to import any of the later posts from my previous blog. I have them backed up I'm sure, but putting them in the current blog, which is in fact, the one previous to the last one (you following this?) is too much trouble for a lazy-arse like me. Anyway, I'm still putting out light-weight, mainly narcissistc crap.

By the way, did you notice the subtle title change this time around? It used to be, 'Blowing One's Trumpet Involuntarity'... I changed it slightly to read... 'Blowing One Strumpet Voluntarily'. It amused me anyway.

A last word: a sweat box NY might have been while I was there, but it couldn't take away the magic. I'll be back!!

Take care and get blogging again soon.

 
At 11:52 AM, Blogger elvira black said...

Don:

I have to say that a comment from you always makes my day! That title change is hilarious--and quite apt. From reading your blog I know how you do enjoy your strumpets!

I'm so glad you enjoyed NYC. I just couldn't take it and rarely left the house the whole summer. But I know what they say about mad dogs and Englishmen...

Stop being so modest already--your blog is a great read and despite your elusiveness your loyal readers still manage to find you and comment. And I hope that next time you visit NYC that we can finally meet up--that would be awesome!

 
At 12:36 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Elvira,

Closer inspection of my blog ought to reveal my interest in smart, articlulate, and erudite ladies. If they happen to be strumpets to boot, then fine... . I know you qualify highly on the first three counts.

I can't wait to meet and sit at the feet of the maestro (does that word apply to both genders? I hesitate to call you maestress)

 
At 1:04 PM, Blogger !ce said...

Welcome back, Elvira. I see I'm not the only one with a new post (insert shameless self-promotion). I am glad to see that you seem to be feeling better. You could always do what I do when unhappy, write and sing little songs about killing men. One of them actually gave me a hook for a gangsta song I've been working on.

I feel I must say something in response to Don's comment. As much as I hate gender division, the appropriate term for a female would be "maestra." In the interest of taking a quick trip around the world: in Turkish, Urdu, Arabic, Farsi, and Hindi, the terms are ustad/ostad or ustaz/ostaz; in Javanese music, the term "pangrawit" is used.

 
At 7:40 PM, Blogger Velvet Jones said...

Hello there. I dropped by the web ring thingie for this bipolar business, saw yours and had to visit. I had the first laugh all day reading your intro under "Shithouse rat" on your page. Thanks! Now I've swung through just about every mood there is today!

 
At 4:08 PM, Anonymous ArtLink said...

It's a nice name Bipolar Planet, especially fit for a store that sells mountain climbing equipment.

 
At 8:49 PM, Blogger elvira black said...

Don:

I hadn't visited your blog for awhile (nor kept up with my latest comments) and I must say that you are in classic form. I love the format and the illustrations, and your posts are terrific. However, I tried to leave a few comments but Blogger didn't let me! Guess I'll try again later...

 
At 10:31 PM, Blogger elvira black said...

Ice:

Hey, thanks! I checked out your latest, and left a little message for you....

 
At 10:33 PM, Blogger elvira black said...

Velvet Jones:

Glad I could provide a laugh! The bipolar planet is a roller coaster ride for sure.

 
At 10:35 PM, Blogger elvira black said...

artlink:

LOL! Thanks for stopping by.

 
At 11:12 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I have been absent for a long time as well. Don't let it deter you from continuing to post when you are able. You have people who care about you! Peace and grace. Don't let anything steal your joy.

 
At 10:22 AM, Anonymous Jason said...

Hey, now that you're back and we've all given you a friendly welcoming, how about posting some more articles? I visit your blog every day in hope of some new "treats".
----
Exchange-of-homes

 
At 2:13 PM, Anonymous pia said...

Wow somebody else who has a Manhattan apartment and doesn't seem to be enamored with Manhattan

I have to prep my apartment, have it appraised and priced and for somebody who has problems actually walking out the door half the time that seems like so much work when I can waste, uh, spend the day blogging

Not that I don't love Manhattan, I have just reached my done it ten thousand times date

Used to be obsessed with real estate. Now it just seems confusing and tiring

 
At 2:56 PM, Blogger elvira black said...

digi:

It's so good to hear from you. I knew you'd understand. I'm trying to crawl out of the hole slowly but surely. Though being bipolar can make it rough, I think a lot of it may be up to me at this point--to just try and make a bit more of an effort. I'll be stopping by to see how you're doing...

 
At 2:58 PM, Blogger elvira black said...

Jason:

I'm very flattered--thanks! Well, I've posted again, but now I have to try to keep up the momentum and not lag behind once more.

 
At 3:07 PM, Blogger elvira black said...

Pia:

Wow...I visited your blog today and was so curious as to why you were leaving Manhattan--guess I have to peruse the archives further. The truth is, I would gladly stay where I am, but my ex-boyfriend and I are...well...ex's and I have a new boyfriend who lives in the Bronx.

And of course, the Bronx is about the only borough I could afford after the 17 1/2 percent flip tax, broker's fees, etc--divide the balance by two and it doesn't leave all that much. But at least, like you, I can pay for the whole thing in cash.

Aside from that, the Bronx is cool. I've spent most of my life living in Manhattan, and in my twenties I couldn't imagine living anywhere else. But as you said, after awhile you can reach that been there, done that point. Quality of life as I get older has more to do with things other than mere location.

Best of luck on selling--I'm so curious as to where you will be going. I'm sure you'll get a nice price, though the spring may be more promising than the winter/holiday season for sales.

 

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