Hit me with your best kvetch
I'd like to invite you all to comment here on something that burns your ass. Bring me your whining, your complaining, your teeming resentments struggling to break free.
If enough of you bitch and moan long enough and loud enough, I may consider taking this to the next level and founding the first Carnival of the Kvetcherati.
For those not familiar with blog carnivals, these are (usually) weekly extravaganzas--generally hosted by different bloggers each time. Interested bloggers can sign up to host a particular carnival. Carnival of the Vanities is the oldest carnival, and can comprise any topic. The other blog carnivals have a specific theme. Bloggers e-mail their best post of the past week (or I suppose they can nominate someone else's--what the hell). The carnival host compiles these submissions, includes a brief description and a link for each one, and publishes the whole thing on the designated carnival day. Since the blog carnivals are publicized on various sites, one of the objectives is to (hopefully) generate more traffic for host and bloggers alike, and to give your best posts more exposure. And that's nothing to kvetch about!
A few of the existing blog carnivals are:
Carnival of Sexy Lingerie
Carnival of the Capitalists
Carnival of the Uncapitalists
Carnival of cats
Carnival of dogs
Carnival of the Clueless
Carnival of satire
Carnival of the mundane
Carnival of recipes
Carnival of Music
For a listing of all the blog carnivals, click here. For an example of a carnival post, click here.
So please feel free to unload here with shameless abandon. Thank you.
Technorati tags:
blog+carnivals
Carnival+of+the+Vanities
kvetch
posted by elvira black @ 8:21 AM
51 Comments:
OK, I'll start. New York City is having the first transit strike in 25 years, starting today. Oy vey!
My friends have been calling me to use me as a dumping ground, and I'm tired of listening to them bitch about their day to day problems.
P.S. Thanks for the information on the Carnivals. This was all new to me, so I'll be exploring it.
hey Elvira!
Just a note to let you know that I'm still alive, and things are going surprisingly well. Thanks for your encouraging words. Talk to you soon.
Danny
Washington Cube:
So your kvetch is that your friends are kvetching at you? I love it!
People can be very self-centered when it comes to sharing the minutae of their day to day existence with others. Don't they know that their friends have problems of their own?
Hell, that's why the Lord invented blogs--so everyone could have a safe place to air their individual rants.
The Carnivals are a pretty cool idea. I've submitted to several of them so far. The Carnival of the Vanities is biggest and most publicized one by far, and it's not limited to any particular topic.
Thanks for the kvetch!
Danny:
Hey, that's great! But...but...don't you still have something you could kvetch about a little here? (lol)
In all honestly, I'm really getting creeped out by the Burger King, ummm Burger King.
If I woke up in my bed with the Burger King trying to feed me something meat-normous, I'd freak.
Dan:
Burger King's promotions are definitely designed to induce psychosis.
Check out Burger King's Subservient Chicken site if you're in a dictatorial mood.
Carnival of Sexy Lingerie, now that sounds like fun to me. Are there photos? Oh, I guess I could complain about not getting laid in over 6 years, but I do that all the time on my own blog. The latest in the lowest of the low: I went on that adultfreindfinders site and signed up. I have sent out a ton of letters. No one has written me back, not even the one who was asking to get paid for sex. Now, you have to be some kind of a loser if a prostitute turns you down, right? I should have just stayed in Jamaica. There was tons of women wanting to score with me there.
Anyone interested in seeing all the various carnivals can also check out the UberCarnival page at TTLB (the Truth Laid Bear). Lots of people are kvetching about TTLB since they reorganized their ecosystem recently --many blogs got devolved. For those who know what I mean, tell me you didn't kvetch!
Timothy:
Sadly, I think the Carnival of Sexy Lingerie was just a cheap bid for hits from some lingerie site. I paid a visit to check it out for ya and there's no carnival there that I can see. Feh.
Not getting laid is always a perennial fave kvetch, but if it's any consolation I'm sure you're not alone there by any means.
I'm confused--I thought you said you asked someone out and they said yes? Wuzzup with that?
And what kind of matchmaking site is it if you write letters? From what you said it sounds like they don't use e-mail? What century is that? I smell scam.
Well, if the babes in Ja-land dig you, maybe you should practice those reggae bass riffs and get yourself on over there again. Start up a band; bring on the groupies!
Up selling.
I had a major kvetch about how shitty upselling is to my man in a movie queue on the weekend ("Like, if I wanted to buy 2 chocolate bars for the price of one, I'd fucken pick up a chocolate! But had I even looked at them? NO!") and when we got to the ticket seller, she said, "Did you know that if you buy your tickets now to the next 3 movies that we also offer free popcorn?"
(*GRRRR*) "No thanks".
Then we went to get a drink.
"Could I get a small coke, thanks."
"Do you want to upsize that? For an extra $50, you can get a large."
"NO. I WANT A SMALL ONE."
"Oh... OK. So, a regular coke?"
"Umm, what? Not diet coke, but small size."
"We don't have small we only have regular."
"Well that's fine."
"That'll be $4.50"
for a coke?! $4.50?! Well I suppose it WAS 'regular' size...
Tell it, girlfriend!
New York has Starbucks coffee shops on every corner. The thing that annoys me is that they use pretentious Italian names for the small, medium, and large sizes. A small coffee is, thus, a "grande"--which makes no sense. But I refuse to play their dirty little doublespeak games. I ask for what I want--in this case a Venti--um, I mean, large.
I hate that Burger King guy too. He's plastic & totally creeps me out.
The Medicare Prescription Plan ~ omg, I've been in tears over there more times than I can count. Different entities give totally different information & while you have until June '06 to pick your plan, come Jan. '06, if you don't pick carefully, you could end up paying full price for your prescriptions. In my case, that's over $700 a month.
I'm 47 & a functioning computer-literate (i think that's the word) adult, imagine an 80 year old trying to figure this system out.
Okay, thanks for letting me unload.
Jane:
Oh yeah, that's a biggie too. The government giveth, and the government confuseth the hell out of the whole country.
I love those new commercials where they show the baby boomers trying to help their elderly parents figure out the plan, saying "I'm finally doing something nice for my mom and dad after all these years of being an ungrateful wretch of a child." Sweet!
Nikky:
Ugh. There oughta be a law about that. Like in some restaurants they say "no sharing" when you get the special all you can eat? That's the only place it's safe to dine with food felons.
Hi Elvira! I can't stand it when people chew with their mouths open, it grosses me out and makes me furious. And I can't stand when people talk on the phone WHILE they are eating.
AND..the word verification thingy. I never get it right the first time, make the damn letters so we can read them!!!
Okay, I'll bite...
My kveltch is the fucking lack of decency shown by any person shopping at Wal Mart. They bring their cootie infested snot factories out in public so they can touch, snot, and lick everything in sight - especially the shopping carts. Then they leave the carts in the parking lot where-the-fuck-ever they plaese (flagrant spelling error for olde tyme's sake). Its as if the cart return was just for the trash and used baby diapers.
Oh, and push in your damn chairs when you leave the table at the restaurant!
I guess that's it...
Thanks!
That's supposed to be by me...
I'm too lazy to sign in...
Love,
Squid
Nver entered a blog carnival. will have to check them out and maybe enter a couple.
Thanks for the info.
Well, I would have complained about how slow New York transit can be on weekends, but sheesh...talk about a moot point.
Ergo, I move on to other pet peeves. For one, I hate it when a word starts getting misspelled on such a regular basis that the wrong spelling suddenly becomes the accepted spelling. For instance, it's spelled DEFINITELY, not DEFINATELY or DEFINATLY. AAUUUUGGHH!
My other big peeve at the moment is people who try to "educate" me on their religion, as if I weren't capable of figuring out what I want to believe on my own. Those lectures are always designed to make the preachee feel inferior and stupid. I don't need to be insulted into believing in something.
P.S. Thanks for the recent comments, Elv!
Well, I have a hangover, for starters. (Note to self: do not drink Kir on an empty stomach again. Even if it's just one. Even on holidays when drinking something red is "festive." You're a lightweight. Remember this.)
Boston is basically coated with ice from December to April and it gets dark at 4 pm. Solstice shmolstice -- I'll be happy when it's spring.
And I agree with the anonymous hater of parents who let their children run amock. Especially in restaurants and coffee shops. Back in the 1970s, and ah, those were the days, I really don't think I was allowed to behave like that.
mrshellonheels:
Eww..chewing with your mouth open. Although on the phone you can only tell they're chewing, not if their mouth is open, but it's even worse because it's amplified. Some people feel the need to multitask everything...sigh...
I don't have a cell phone, and I have Issues about people who stand in the middle of the subway staircase to get better reception and block people's way.
The word verification--well, it's a necessary evil, even when it tries to imply you're a splog by not passing you on your first try. Better that than all those penis-extension ads...at least, I think so...but good kvetch anyway.
Squid:
Cootie infested snot factories--that's a keeper! There's no Walmarts in NYC proper that I know of, but when my b/f and I went to visit his folks in the midwest burbs, we were awestruck at the wonder of it all. But I definitely hear you on that one.
And the chair thing--almost as bad as the women who pee all over the public toilet seats. Where were these people brought up--in a tent?
Mr. 12-step:
You're welcome--the blog fests are a great idea, arent' they?
Ahem...now where's my kvetch?
Lord Buckingham:
Thanks for the opening...now I can kvetch for a minute about the NYC transit strike. I'm getting very peeved at NYC bloggers who support the Transit Worker's Union's illegal disruption of the city during the busiest shopping time of the year. It's estimated that there will be a loss of 1.6 billion if the strike lasts a week--via lost business, tourism, etc. And they've got a decent package. In BG's Bronx hood, the average person makes one-half to one-third of what these workers make. So to all those NYC bloggers who work from home and can "afford" to be armchair socialists--piss off!
Secondly--as far as spelling, I can say nothing, because I'm trying to make nicey nice to someone...you know who you are. I think misspellings are more "forgivable" on blogs--at least up to a reasonable point. But yeah...
Prostletyzing (sp?) religious fanatics can bite me too. Scratch that..just step off, and walk away.
Artdetective:
Kir--is that that delicious rasperry liqueur? Yum.
In any case, I'd avoid coffee shops til your hangover has abated,since the aural shock of screeching kids breaking the sound barrier might be a bit offputting at this time.
I'm guessing Boston and NYC have similar climates. One year I went to Miami during winter break, which was nice. But then Florida has all those hurricanes, so unless you're a jet setter, you gotta pay the piper with the weather one way or another. It blows, though.
Something that burns my ass.
Other than Texas chile I pressume.
WoW so much!
Maybe I am thinking to much on this hmmmmmmmmm.
OK
My Ex was a fashion designer.
All the models are skinny ass titless women.
Why don't they use REAL women to model the clothes?
Thats the taret consumer
I'll save the other 1,254.346 for another time.
Gum-snapping.
Not saying "please" and "thank you" when appropriate
Telemarketers
Spammers ("DIE DIE DIE"!)
People who can't drive in the rain
People who can't drive at all
Muzak
Fat women wearing clothes too small for them (I'd add fat men to this, but I never see men doing this)
Dr. Phil when he uses a homespun homily and the audience laughs
Oprah when she gets all uber-feminist and male-bashy
"Happy Holidays". Pick a holiday and wish me a "Happy" of it. I'm sick of seasonal generalizations.
Overly-aggressive Christians. Yes, Mr. Jehovah Witness/Mr. Morman and your whole family standing on my front porch with pamphlets in hand...I'm looking at you
I also wholeheartedly agree about the gum snappers and other people who are just rude. Well-kvetched.
Kir Royale is a drink made with champagne and creme de cassis. The one I had last night was very sweet, and must be the origin of this morning's headache.
Elvira:
I'm declaring war with DHL right now over a stinking package. Well, I was anyway...We'll see if it arrives tonight like they say it will.
My biggest thing right now next to that would be dealing with my local post office. I went on about this in detail on my blog. :)
Elvie:
I don't so much mind mispellings in personal spaces like blogs, but when horrendously obvious typos make it into mainstream web or print publications, as a writer/editor scraping to get by myself, it makes me wonder why they hired THAT editor instead of me.
Some people are worried that handwriting ability and legibility are taking a major hit now that everybody types. I'm not sure what to think about that since I grew up on the cusp of both. I had traditional handwriting and cursive in school, and didn't own a real PC until I graduated in '96. The Commodore 128D and Atari 800XL "home computers" don't really count as PCs to me since all we really did on them was play games and write computer programs.
Thus, the pen may be mightier than the sword, but is the keyboard trumping them both?
I hate you if you are the TWU. Do you even know why you are striking days before christmas? No you don't. You are not working because your union "leader" Toussant is fighting for FUTURE workers, not current. He wants to make sure that future unskilled workers can retire at 55 with pension that you pay for with higher fares. None of you will retire at 55 unless you're an obnoxious trust fund baby. Is is sooooo bad to retire at 62? Again we're talking about FUTURE employees that don't even exist yet. You know future employees of the MTA that is laying people off ever year and NOT hiring new employees. Let's not forget, they want to pay NOTHING for health insurance. maybe if we had some kind of national healthcare we wouldn't have to rely on employers to provide insurance, but we don't and we do. I pay a portion of my premiums, a good portion and I am an "educated" and "skilled" employee or so my employer thinks. Paying a whole 1% of your 50k annual salary torward healthcare, not a big deal you selfish bastards. Oh I don't get a pension either, i have to fund my entire retirement which a tiny match from a company, so as Timberlake says (tongue in cheek) cry me a fucking river. Now I'm walking 3.5 miles each way in the frigid cold to get to work where I can only hate. I've gotten sick because because oh you Toussaint or however you spell your annoying name. I move to fire every single MTA employee, all of em. I'd rather walk to work everyday, including in the rain than pay for some unskilled asshole to retire at 55 on my dollar. And for the minimal number of skilled workers, boo fucking hoo, go get a job somewhere else, you're the only ones that can. TWU, Merry Hating Christmas.
Constipation!
Walker:
I agree--I think the heroin chic look sucks. However, I think especially in New York, looking like an anorexic boy will get you more dates than you can shake a stick at.
Neil at Citizen of the Month had a very cool post recently where he posted pix of a super skinny model and a more zoftig one. Neil said he liked the latter over the former, but a surprising number of people thought the curvier woman was, like, a fat pig.
I'd link to it, but Neil's blog is acting up and his beta screening program somehow read my latest comment as spam. That is too scary to mess with right now.
Amber:
Ooh, a multi-kvetch--cool! I'll just pick one and run with it.
Not saying please and thank you when appropriate--unbelieveable that anyone does this, isn't it? A "trivial" example: most people will say thank you if you hold a door for them, but some will just breeze by and say nothing. That slays me every time. I couldn't NOT say thank you--polite people are hard wired so they don't even have to think about it. Who ARE these people? Are they even people at all?
artdetective:
Yep, Kir Royales are yummy, but the payback's a bitch.
Danny:
Thanks for coming back and giving up the kvetch.
When you said DHL, I was thinking of DSL, which you also kvetched about before.
I agree, botched deliveries and post office snafus can really make you go postal.
Lord Buckingham:
I've also done my fair share of copyediting, and yes, the whole point is to be scupulous about grammar, spelling, syntax, etc. Since I was so used to this exercise, when I submitted an article for publication I edited it so thoroughly that the editor wouldn't change one letter. I'd wager that's kinda rare.
As far as electronic communications, I have a theory. You know how doctors have horrible handwriting? To me, it seems to connote that they're too busy and important to write legibly. Same goes for e-mail, in my opinion. One of my editors was uber-literate, and it was his job to make sure MY submissions were letter perfect. But if I got an e-mail from him, no matter how brief, it was full of egregious typos every time.
This kind of thing, I think, is a status marker--it says to the recipient: do you honestly think I'm gonna spend an extra nanosecond proofreading my e-mail before I send it out to YOU? I'm much too busy and important for that nonsense.
Lemme tell you, it works.
Doofi:
You said what had to be said, and said it as only you could. Excellente!
Another bullshit line I've heard is that the TWU just wants the MTA and the public to treat them with more "dignity" and "respect." As you so eloquently put it, boo fuckin' hoo. I don't get too much dignity and respect when I buy a Metrocard from the stations that still offer this "personalized" service.
Some of the subway stations have no Metrocard clerks now, as you know. But that doesn't mean they're gone, or not collecting a salary for doing nothing.
The other day, I tried to swipe my Metrocard to see how much money I had left. The swiper wouldn't work. Behind the booth sat an employee doing what appeared to be absolutely nothing. Meanwhile, one of the two Metrocard machines wasn't even accepting bills. I shudder to think what will happen when the machines don't work and you have some overpaid clown sitting in a booth not dispensing Metrocards, just warming a seat until their cushy retirement at 55. Give me a freakin' break!
Paula:
Short, sweet, and to the point.
Constipation is truly one of the scourges of humankind. And such a time-waster too!
I hate when you hold a door for someone, and they don't say thank you or grab the door from you. If you're ever on a college campus and see a group of cheerleaders, do not hold the door for them. Twenty of them will walk through one after the other, and none of them will grab the door from you. You'll just have to stand there for two minutes, leaning against an open door. I hate humans.
I also hate my trust issues. It's hard to know whom it is safe to trust when there be so many playas out there. Then when you finally find anyone worth trusting, it is almost impossible to do so, especially when you be dealing with several other untrustworthy people at the same time. I really hate humans.
I hate people who misunderstand and dismiss psychology and mental illness. It's fine if you a backwoods neanderthal like my parents, but don't force that on me or any of the others with actual brains.
I hate bad parents, and I am always seeing them whenever I go out to a public place. Also at home. If you're going to scream at, hit, and insult, or otherwise abuse your children, you deserve the Menendez treatment.
As ironic as it might sound, I hate men. Let me start by saying that there are a few exceptions. Ignoring these exceptions, I have a statement to make. Straight men are ignorant, self-obsessed baboons who act like sociopathic neanderthals because they are deathly afraid that anyone might not think they are Conan. Gay men are manipulative, shallow, superficial, narcissistic nymphomaniacs. Bisexual men have the qualities of the above two categories.
This is trite, but I hate that my best friend will say I'm pretty, but my parents won't. He also has held my hand, which the dogs won't. Why is it that I have to depend on him for nurturing, affection, and encouragement that I theoretically should be able to get at home? At least the dogs have potential.
I hate the way that cookbooks take for granted the use of animal products. Alternative ingredients are marginalized, much like my viewpoints in a lot of settings. Let's burn all of the oppressive books and people. The same is true of any music that doesn't involve a half-naked 20-year-old singing songs that sound like bad yearbook entries.
Do I get brownie points for sharing? (Actually, make that vegan carob brownie points.)
here's a few bitches for ya:
1. the idiot who actually cried because i took the last boston creme doughnut at the bakery. OMG!!! i promised my son i'd bring home his favorite doughnut from the bakery, he doesn't understand the concept that when it's gone, it's gone. this lady acted like her world just stopped rotating! she didn't need it, she just wanted it. she was seriously overweight and already had 2 dozen doughnuts boxed up, that one boston cream isn't gonna make or break her day, she was just greedy and selfish!
2. the lady at the store who actually sprinted to get in front of me in line! her cart was so full she could barely see past it, then she looks at me with this look of satisfaction like she won or something. i get the last laugh though because since her cart was so full she didn't see they were getting ready to open another register and i got to be the first in line. i then felt the need to stick my tongue out at her.
3. the car dealership who tried to sell me a new car that i didn't want! i only went there for a part because it was only available from the dealer and cost a fortune! i don't wanna buy a car, i want the 300 dollar part to fix my car, the reason for my visit here. personally i'd rather have an old ass steel car than these piece of shit fiberglass and plastic cars now days. at least in an old car you can crash the s.o.b. at 80 mph and walk away, these new ones crumble like a soda can and kill you! so foohy on you car salesman!
Ice:
I am weeping with gratitude and joy as I read you comment. Beautiful, just beautiful!
Yeah, when a gaggle of broads pass through a door gabbing on their cell phones and totally think you're, like, the invisible doorman, I want to kill too.
I'm glad you are an equal-opportunity misanthrope who hates straight and gay men equally. But it sounds like you think us women are ok (whew...)
Hey, your friend sounds way cool. You think there's any possible...potential there, if you know what I mean?
Thanks Ice--I knew I could count on you for some nice juicy kvetching.
Jessie:
This is rich! I love a good grocery store horror story. That was so cool that the line-cutting bitch got her comeuppance. And crying over a lost donut? Someone would actually want to rip the last Boston Creme out of the trusting hands of a child?
As for cars, I don't deal with them. But for what it's worth, I wish they'd bring back the old classics. Every car I've seen since the 70s looks uglier and uglier. Actually, I think someone is now in the process of bringing out classic car designs again--and not a moment too soon.
Glad you liked. I actually have another one. Earlier this year or late last year, I needed to borrow an amount of money, and the bank convinced me that the way to go would be to have a credit card with the bank's emblem on it. I knew what they were doing, but I figured as long as I used it limitedly, it wouldn't be too bad. Unfortunately, my impulsivity and my card met. I haven't received any bills for this card for several months. The other day, I get this letter from the bank saying that I needed to pay them at least $50 by the 14th (I got this letter after the 14th, by the way). It also said if I didn't give them at least $50 by the 27th, they would be forced to take legal action. I told the loan officer from my branch on the phone that I wouldn't have that amount until the beginning of the month. I offered to pay a smaller amount that I could afford. I was quickly told that it needed to be $50 and needed to be received sooner than that(arterial flow problem?).
About my friend, he is a total sweetheart who treats me very well, but he is indeed hetero. Luckily, he doesn't mind me hitting on him a lot, and occasionally does it back, but nothing more than flirting can come of this. This is cool, because he's such a great friend that it makes up the difference. He has two gay bosses who hit on him sometimes, and a lot of their friends come in to shop, and some of them like to hit on him as well, so it's fortunate that he's very comfortable with that. He says that he considers it a compliment, and that he's glad I feel comfortable enough to interact with him in that way. Long story made short, he is one of the "exceptions" I referred to.
Back to previous subject, death to capitalism.
Lord Buckingham - my humblest apologies, sire. i do believe I may on occasion have misspelt 'definitely' with an 'a'.
Ice:
The credit card company is going to take legal action over 50 dollars? You know how expensive "legal action" is?
Most people under the age of 80 have credit card horror stories. My ex-b/f and I got into debt to the tune of about 60 grand (yes, you read right). Rather than declare bankruptcy, we went to one of those debt consolidation services and paid it all off in about 4 year's time. And guess how much the debt consolidation service charged? Fifty dollars a month.
Thing is, the credit card companies can't wait to get ahold of anyone and everyone, no matter what their income or lack thereof. At my alma mater, whenever you bought a book at the college bookstore, the clerk would stick one of those credit card offer thingees in the bag. Sure, college students have lots of disposable income and are surely mature enough to handle credit, right? Not that I was mature enough either, mind you--and I was no teenager when I got into hot water.
Is it possible your friend might be...how you say...bi curious? Just a thought.
I got a letter from the bank today, and they have decided that I owe them 76-something by 12/30. They also sent me another envelope, including the missing statements for the last three months. They sent me a third envelope containing a notarized version of the letter where they announce their plan to collect. Oh yes, I love America.
I'm pretty sure he's entirely heterosexual. It is nice, though, that he lets me get by with some interesting comments.
Justine:
I think Lord Buckingham is a forgiving lord...lol.
Ice:
The credit card companies sure do spend a lot on postage, don't they? Well, in this case, technically the credit card via the bank.
AMEX, Visa, et al definitely invest a lot of printing and postage on those mass credit card offering/ mailings too--and pass the non-savings on to you.
I dunno, Ice...it sounds like your friend might be flexible. However, since you said you're asexual, maybe this is the ideal relationship for you, at least for now. Friendship often lasts longer than those "brief encounters" anyway.
I think the thing with the bank has definitely reached the point of cattiness now.
I still believe he's simply very liberal. I don't feel any non-hetero vibes coming from him.
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