Cleaning out the Shithouse
THE NEW AOL COMMERCIAL---LOVE IT
There's this new AOL commercial with a nerdy guy I think is really cool and (if I weren't taken) I'd even say is totally hot. Know the one I mean? He's an AOL pimp telling everyone about all the virus protection and features of the new AOL and a little guy speaks up for the whole skeptical group, firing questions off at him:
On a similar note, I love those Geek Squad ads where the nerds descend from the sky and parachute down, rushing to a damsel in distress when her cry reverberates throughout the land after her computer crashes. (No, No. Nooooooooo!) I can only dream about what a wonderful world it would be if this really happened. At my office, our geek squad consisted of one disgruntled, bitter employee who played favorites. You had to kiss ass bigtime with this bitch if you wanted your e-mail account fixed or your hard drive replaced. That reminds me, I killed my hard drive once. It gave out a loud groan that lasted a few excruciating minutes and then...silence. I still have guilt about it to this day. Therapy hasn't helped.
THE NEW SAMSUNG CAMCORDER COMMERCIAL--HATE IT
There's this new Samsung commercial with a little goofy corporate newbie, fantasizing about how he's going to rise to the top with his little Samsung camcorder. First he shows his boss the pictures he took of the office Christmas party, where his boss was frolicking around with a lampshade on his head. He gets the corner office and a company Jaguar. Then he e-mails the Vice President and shows him pix of another party where the Vice President is grabbing someone's tits or something embarassing. He gets assigned to the Mediterranean account. Then he's on the company jet with the CEO who asks him to bring his camcorder to the next office party. Meanwhile, geek boy is trying to get a good crotch shot of the dishy flight attendant as she passes by.
This little wet behind the ears, young whippersnapper represents all that I think is wrong with our youth today. (Gets up on soapbox). Don't these young punks know that it takes years of backstabbing, lying, and cheating to rise to the top of your profession? You've got to pay your dues in this world. Sheesh.
You know when you go to your e-mail and see like 10 new messages and get all excited? Since I answer comments in batches, I hate it when I open up the mailbox and see they're all from me--since Blogger e-mails you back your own comments as well as everyone else's. Good morning, heartache!
THE SEVEN YEAR BITCH
You know when your boyfriend of seven years exhibits zero respect and sympathy for your blogging jones and constantly harangues you to to "turn off that stupid toy before I rip it out of the wall?"
Oh, sorry. That's just me and BG.
WHO IS BUSH'S BITCH?
Bush has been doing a lot of damage control speeches, talking about how he will stay the course in Iraq. There was a shot of him at the podium during one of these apologias, and standing next to him was some weird lady in a bizarre hat. She looked like some crazy old woman who has 20 cats. Please, someone, tell me--who was that lady? Another misbegotten Supreme Court nominee?
You've head the hubbub about the pharmacists who are refusing to fill birth control prescriptions, right? All I can suggest is that when women have unwanted pregnancies because of this guy that they carry the baby to term and present the newborn to the pharmacist to raise. Let's see how long he squalks about the "sanctity of life" when he's involuntarily adopted all the squalling babies in the neighborhood.
Ahhh, that feels better.....